when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
