she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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