Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
