I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
