its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
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