you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
