Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
