I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
