Yo dont text me then not text me
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Everything about him screamed your future.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
