Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize
