idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
