I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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