oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
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