To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
