He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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