Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
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THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
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Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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