She is in my trunk
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
