First date: that requires underwear, huh?
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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