Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Randomize
