He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Randomize
