Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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