Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Randomize
