Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
