do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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