Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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