i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
