"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
me + whiskey = a bad person
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
