That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Actions speak louder than pants.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
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