so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
