I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i drank out of a bidet.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
