And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
