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• (949): View more from California

  ...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail

  (949): View more from California

  ps not my toothbrush awkward.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?

  (1-630): View more from Illinois

  did you know it's going to storm tonight?

  (630): View more from Illinois

  You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.

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• 

  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.

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• (415): View more from California

  You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I thought you were single?

  (1-262): View more from Wisconsin

  I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot

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