ADVERTISEMENT

• (816): View more from Missouri

  Are you guys doing anything tonight?

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Krysta

  Fav 9 2298 830

  share tweet
  

• (281): View more from Texas

  i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy

  Fav 4 2968 964

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (206): View more from Washington

  Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.

  Fav 27 2190 5981

  share tweet
  

• (740): View more from Ohio

  I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?

  Fav 8 3983 1193

  share tweet
  
• 

  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (859): View more from Kentucky

  and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.

  Fav 10 1788 766

  share tweet
  

• (513): View more from Ohio

  That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber

  Fav 4 1643 772

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (873): View more from

  I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in

  Fav 3 2287 704

  share tweet
  

• (609): View more from New Jersey

  I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.

  Fav 2 580 994

  share tweet
  

• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.

  Fav 7 638 1216

  share tweet
  
• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (+81): View more from

  I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat

  Fav 1 822 707

  share tweet
  

• (914): View more from New York

  Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair

  Fav 1 2013 691

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (310): View more from California

  I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.

  Fav 1 992 685

  share tweet
  

• (775): View more from Nevada

  He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b

  Fav 0 369 218

  share tweet
  

• (419): View more from Ohio

  I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex

  Fav 0 46 5

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (716): View more from New York

  My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough

  Fav 0 29 8

  share tweet
  

Randomize