Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
