Texts From Last Night

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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!

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  (405): You can't have hate sex in a hallway!! http://tfl.nu/3bhn
  Replies (22) Good night (4066) Bad night (679)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...

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  (706): first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor... http://tfl.nu/ezfa
  Replies (7) Good night (752) Bad night (3571)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.

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  (706): I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom. http://tfl.nu/0mx3
  Replies (28) Good night (4954) Bad night (977)
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  (914): View more from New York

  you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds

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  (914): you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds http://tfl.nu/u8pq
  Replies (36) Good night (6432) Bad night (1131)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed

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  (317): he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed http://tfl.nu/zklq
  Replies (12) Good night (6575) Bad night (1063)
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  (980): View more from North Carolina

  You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.

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  (980): You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls. http://tfl.nu/1jxr
  Replies (12) Good night (2161) Bad night (3340)
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  (714): View more from California

  I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.

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  (714): I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later. http://tfl.nu/riev
  Replies (17) Good night (2047) Bad night (2450)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.

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  (850): He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville. http://tfl.nu/tme9
  Replies (20) Good night (1174) Bad night (2642)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future

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  (518): Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future http://tfl.nu/c1z9
  Replies (1) Good night (1136) Bad night (905)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...

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  (270): I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night... http://tfl.nu/q37f
  Replies (6) Good night (573) Bad night (1160)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break

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  (704): Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break http://tfl.nu/3onf
  Replies (1) Good night (364) Bad night (747)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  We need to make tonight low-budget

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  Is this your way of suggesting flasks?

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  (248): We need to make tonight low-budget (1-248): Is this your way of suggesting flasks? http://tfl.nu/fx4j
  Replies (1) Good night (781) Bad night (324)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.

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  (701): Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5. http://tfl.nu/g6zt
  Replies (4) Good night (433) Bad night (1160)
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  (743): View more from

  Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.

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  (743): Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames. http://tfl.nu/fevf
  Replies (1) Good night (624) Bad night (197)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend

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  (614): I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend http://tfl.nu/qkfk
  Replies (5) Good night (378) Bad night (140)

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