I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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