Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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