A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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