Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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