I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize