make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
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