U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
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