yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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