look no pants
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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