I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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