Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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