The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
