we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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