Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
