BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
