I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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